Packing his flimsy boxing gloves with rocks, the president has boldly decided to call for higher taxes on millionaires—a proposal that won't do much to thaw an icy, cruel Congress but is meant, instead, for restless lefty voters looking for Barack Obama to finally start mustering some populist spunk. Republicans already have their echo chamber limbered up: CLASS WARFARE! (Never mind that much of a plutocrat's money actually comes from sources like capital gains that are taxed at a far lower rate the work-a-day paychecks that us proles have to subsist on.)

That's no small issue for the president, even as his team finds itself well on the way to a $1 billion re-election fund. Liberal groups are loudly grumbling about a lack of backbone. And some activists (really just Ralph Nader and Cornel West) want to draft a primary opponent who wouldn't be expected to seriously challenge the president, but might force him to answer for being the centrist president he kinda/sorta always said he'd be.

Of course, here's what happens when a leader has too much spunk. Yesterday in GMN, we found Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi accused of using government planes to ferry escorts to his soirees. Today we hear tale of the 74-year-old bragging that he once bedded eight women in one night. Which I submit, absent the ingestion of turgidity pharmaceuticals, is bullshit.

As if accidentally being seen letting your child play at a McDonald's Playland wasn't embarrassing enough, one researcher is doing her best to prove that doing so—letting your kids scramble over sticky, germy, graffiti-ridden plastic—might actually be harmful to their health, too.

Binging on pain pills and anxiety meds, and then swilling down cheap alcohol for good measure, Americans for the first time are now more likely to die of a drug overdose than in some kind of spectacular traffic wreck.

A disabled woman sitting in a chair
—not in the sidewalk—while waiting for the ice cream truck to make its rounds, was thrown to the ground by an Atlanta cop with a history of aggression who decided she was being "disorderly."

The battle to stamp out
the last embers of Moammar Gadhafi's reign in Libya has encountered a few hiccups.

Why do Rick Perry and George W. Bush defy reason and logic by stubbornly refusing to love one another? It turns out W., back when he was governor of Texas, refused to appoint Perry's brother-in-law to the state bench. Or so the scuttlebutt goes.

No matter who succeeds David Wu in Congress, the $3 billion Columbia River Crossing project will have a fast friend in Oregon's First District.

Protesters in Yemen continue to call for the ouster of their dictator, and the dictator's loyal soldiers—defying a cease fire—continue to gun them down when they rally. This time, 15 people, at least, have been killed.

THIS IS ADORABLE. BECAUSE IT STARS A SMALL CHILD AND MAKES MENTION OF A "PUPPY DOG." AWWW.