One of the last major Occupy camps, Occupy Los Angeles, is scheduled for eviction in just more than 12 hours. The reasons—health and sanitation, etc.—sound a lot like what we heard in other cities, including our own. But what about the relative ease of the police action? Activists in L.A. are warning that the firm deadline set by officials will backfire and create an unnecessary clash.

“What keeps police chiefs up at night is that somehow the purpose of the movement will become about actions that the police have taken.” The head of the Police Executive Research Forum once again rebuffs concerns his think-tank coordinated a nationwide police crackdown on Occupy.

FOUND AT OCCUPY WALL STREET! One bow-tie-sporting nerd college kid from South Dakota whose little-town shoes were longing to stray.

That Wal-Mart shopper who pepper-sprayed people? She turned herself in but might not face any charges—which, if nothing else, shows that a presumed lack of accountability over use of force will be evenly applied.

The thin-skinned governor of Kansas had a teenage girl called into her principal's office after his staff noticed she'd slagged him (and barely for fucksake) in a throw-away tweet.

Syria's neighbors, uniting in the Megazord form better-known as the Arab League, have decided to rain down economic sanctions and general condemnation—all because, aw shit, Syria keeps, y'know, ruthlessly gunning down civilians and protesters.

The living avatar of inchoate hypocrisy, Newt Gingrich, has snatched the "coveted" endorsement of a leading New Hampshire newspaper away from the plutocratic grip of Sears catalog model Mitt Romney. Gingrich, the latest non-Mormon 2012 presidential hope for the desperate Republican party, has parlayed his former career as a political exile into brisk business on the books-and-bullshit-lecture circuit.

Oh, and Iran just called! It was all, like, "Hi, America and Israel. If you fucking bomb us, or whatever, we'll just take it out on your dumpy little pal, Turkey."

Pakistan is fantastically pissed off after a NATO strike the other day killed 24 of its soldiers, the latest outrage for its leaders after the bin Laden raid and a never-ending stream of drone attacks. It's cut off NATO supply routes into Afghanistan and has told the U.S. to abandon the "secret" airbase on its land where drone strikes are launched.

A little-known company called the Freedom Group, with backing from GIANT private-equity buyout firm Cerberus Capital Management, has slowly been purchasing, and taking control of, the country's biggest and most popular gun manufacturers. This newfound economy of scale is very, very good for the nation's already-fearsome gun lobby.

Smoking cigarettes is good for your marathon times. Maybe.

IS THIS "SEXY"? CAN SOMEONE TELL ME? REALLY! IS THIS A GOOD WAY TO "MAKE IT" WITH "THE LADIES"? BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE IT MIGHT BE, RIGHT? RIGHT??