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Monday, January 9, 2012

Santorum Slings Mud—At Least It Looks Like Mud—In New Hampshire

Posted by Dan Savage on Mon, Jan 9, 2012 at 9:46 AM

Politics is so ugly.

Officials from Rick Santorum’s presidential campaign confirmed over the weekend that the candidate had instructed them to quickly develop a new, preferably disgusting, sexual term for fellow Republican candidate and competitor Mitt Romney. “It is correct that we are working on a counter-balance to the term ‘Santorum’, which as everyone knows by now is defined as ‘the frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the by-product of anal sex,’ ” said Santorum campaign manager Mike Biundo.

“Currently, we’re considering whether a ‘Romney’ should mean ‘having sex with a dog on top of a car while going to Canada on vacation with your family,’ or ‘anally ejecting previously inserted uncooked cranberries into the orifice of the cooked turkey with which you’re engaging in various sexual activities.’”

“We’re still working on it though,” admitted Biundo.

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