Joss Whedon, once and possibly future King of the Nerds, took some time out of his day to sit down in front of a computer, and field questions from the internet in general via Reddit.com. If you're unfamiliar with Reddit, the best way to describe it is thus: Imagine a wall-eyed cow, with about 20 stomachs, laying on its back, constantly vomiting image memes and tech news into its own mouth, swallowing, metabolizing, and then barfing up more memes. It is a kinder, gentler synthesis of the more appealing elements of its predecessors, which include 4chan, rotten.com, fark.com comment boards, and usenet itself, amongst others.
So, what was revealed? Well, the future of Firefly (if there is such a future) the future of Dr. Horrible, How Angel and Dollhouse might have looked if they'd lived longer, what it was like directing the biggest, most important single creative endeavor he's ever undertaken in his whole life, and a couple other things, all in that patented Joss Whedon interview style many have come to know and appreciate, i.e. glib as fuck. So lets get glib, kids. Affix your internet goggles, put a bib of some sort on, wade on in, and to quote Samuel L. Jackson in one of his finest roles of the early 90s, "Hold onto your butts."
On being known as "The guy who kills people."
Actually, I'm, no offense, very tired of being labelled as "the guy who kills people". Shakespeare (he's this hot new writer) does it way more than me, and everyone's all excited about how he, as it were, holds a mirror up to nature, while I'm like the Jason Voorhees of the writing community. Unfair.
Since he's somewhat comparing himself to Shakespeare, the major difference is that the beloved people Shakespeare killed in his plays die in myriad ways, for myriad purposes. Most of the beloved people Whedon kills in his television shows are killed for the same reason: To teach a protagonist that loving people is dangerous. That's it. The comparison to Jason Voorhees fits better because Jason also murdered beautiful people for daring to be happy in front of him for too long.
When asked "Why do you kill everyone I love?"
You love stupid people.
THE GLIBNESS. IT BURNS. THE GOGGLES! THEY DO NOTHING.
Obviously we're supposed to let loose a "snerk" of laughter and move along to the next question, but lets say we take that answer at face value: According to Joss Whedon, the list of stupid people he's created include: Wash, Joyce, Fred, Book, Spike, Anya, Tara, Wesley, Penny, and Buffy. Some of those characters were annoying, and some acted dumb on occasion, but honestly, the only character in that list I can see as being legitimately stupid is Buffy. And he brought her back. TWICE.
On the campaign to use Kickstarter as a means of reviving Firefly
Step 2: Cancel Castle. Step 3: Cancel Homeland. Step 4: Generally destroy everybody's careers. Step 5: Avoid Step 2.
So, yeah. No. Not happening. But for good Firefly news, he stated that Objects in Space, the final episode of Firefly, would be the one piece of work he would put forward as best representing what he's all about, creatively.
On where Dollhouse would have gone had he gotten more time
It would have been a much slower odyssey of Echo’s self-creation and liberation, peppered with astonishing perversions.
Considering the biggest problem with the show was that it was centered on Echo in the first place, I'm glad Dollhouse was cut short. In fact, Dollhouse probably should have just been a movie, instead of a television show. He made his bones in TV, yes, but I'm much more excited by the Whedon that exists now, the one who, after getting his puddly hands all burnt constantly playing with fire around Fox executives, decided "You know what? Fuck this. I'm just gonna make a bunch of movies." We could have Avengers, Cabin in the Woods, and Much Ado About Nothing all ready to go...or we could be ignoring another 20+ hours of Dollhouse wherein Eliza Dushku stares blankly at a camera and tries to remember being a callow student at Reed College inbetween bouts of assassiprostitutimurder.
On where Angel would have gone if there'd been a sixth season
Season six of Angel would have kicked all manner of ass. And Illyria would have manifested as Fred often enough to become very confused about her identity.
I think I might have liked to see that, but on the other hand, out of all his television shows, Angel was the only one to get a legitimately great ending. I know the show was supposed to go six, but I like that it went five, and I like how it went out. Honestly, American television seasons are way too damn long as it is. A season of television shouldn't be more than 13 episodes, max. Anything longer than that is bloat and padding, treading water as a means to secure a syndication deal that isn't worth shit in 2012, because what the fuck is syndication in a world where Netflix lives in every entertainment box you own?
On not getting to work with Ed Norton in Avengers.
It let me cast Mark Ruffalo, one of the best and sweetest actors I know, and, I think, THE definitive Bruce Banner.
On working with the rest of the cast in Avengers
Like herding adorable kittens.
On Dr. Horrible 2
We're not shooting right now, we're still in the early stages of writing. But we hope to make a great deal of progress this summer. And you can expect the death of someone you love.
Oh, Joss. You ginger scamp, you.
Here's some Avengers clips, if you haven't seen em already. Also, Cabin in the Woods opens this weekend. You're probably going to want to see that. If you'd like to get the uncut raw interview, sans my running commentary (but replaced with loads of HOLY SHIT YES THAT ANSWER WAS GREAT AND YOU ARE GREAT OH MY JOSS I'M CRYING) then here you go.
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