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Thursday, May 17, 2012

SL Letter of the Day: Laying Down the Mother-In-Law

Posted by Dan Savage on Thu, May 17, 2012 at 10:29 AM

I recently said "YES!" to my fiancé and we're getting married in the fall. He's perfect in (almost) every way except for one: ever since his dad died he's been the biggest mama's boy. I understand and love his mom dearly, but I found out that my fiancé told his mother that she could accompany us on our HONEYMOON. His mom is so ecstatic. WHAT WAS HE THINKING?!? How do I fix this? I love my fiancé AND his mother, but only said yes to marrying one. Advice?! You're the BEST.

Mundane Over Mom

My response after the jump...

Oh, good—an easy one.

You don't need to fix this, MOM. Your fiancé does.

He needs to call his mother ASAP and say this: "Mom, I'm really sorry, but I shouldn't have invited you to accompany me on my upcoming honeymoon. You know I love you, and you know MOM loves you, but we're going on our honeymoon alone. We'll plan a trip when we get back—a trip for all three of us—later this year, maybe over the holidays. But we're going to be honeymooning as a couple."

If your fiancé won't say that to his mother—if he can't clean up this mess by disinviting his mom without blaming you and poisoning your relationship with your future MIL—don't marry him.


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