This is a Friday afternoon sort of a question, but I am writing a review of the movie Hysteria, about a doctor who specializes in relieving "female hysteria" by touching ladies rhythmically in their nether regions until their symptoms just sort of... dissolve. (Science!) I want to refer to him as Doctor Handjob, but whenever I use the term "handjob" to refer to something performed on, rather than by, a woman, Copy Chief Courtney Ferguson gets mad at me for transgressing against her precious English language. Whereas I think the female-specific terms "fingering" and "finger-banging" are gross—because I am not 13 years old and we are not in the back of a schoolbus on the way to marching band practice—and see no reason why handjobs can't be had by everyone.

SO! Today's legally binding Blogtown poll: Can women get handjobs, or does some other term apply?