This Week in the Mercury

Hall Monitor


Hall Monitor

(Dead-)End Game on Street Fee?

All-Ages Action!


All-Ages Action!

This Week's Best All-Ages Shows

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Crying Children Review The Odd Life of Timothy Green

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Tue, Aug 21, 2012 at 10:44 AM

With the possible exception of Erik Henriksen, all film critics should be FIRED after being on the job for two years. (In Erik's case, one year.) WHY? Because watching movies day in and day out turns even the most gushing cinema lover into a cold, cynical b-hole who can never enjoy or be moved by anything ever again.

That's why I'm seriously considering firing ALL of Portland's film critics, and replacing them with two bawling kids sitting in the backseat of a car. Because THESE kids know how to fucking experience a film. Check out their inconsolable (and therefore absolutely hilarious) review of The Odd Life of Timothy Green. If you ever care about anything as much as these kids care about this film, I might hire you, too.

Ha Ha HAAAAAA! That's right, you blubbering baby critics! CRYYYYYYYY!!!


Subscribe to this thread:

Comments are closed.

All contents © Index Newspapers, LLC

115 SW Ash St. Suite 600
Portland, OR 97204

Contact Info | Privacy Policy | Production Guidelines | Terms of Use | Takedown Policy