Even though you will want to, really badly, because it is the large, colorful focal point of a room that is otherwise decorated exclusively in grays, and you have spent two days staring at it in a listless, purgatorial haze. (Did you know jury duty is two days now? It is!)

Because if you do make fun of the art, say on Twitter, just hypothetically—someone will point out this article, and then you will feel like an even worse person than you already did after watching a morning show segment on the jury-room TV about a woman who spent a year without makeup. (I AM SUPPOSED TO WEAR MAKEUP EVERY DAY????)

Reporting from jury duty, Hallett out.