In this week's film section, senior editor/film editor Erik Henriksen wrote the following in regards to the BAM (Beer and Movies) film fest:

A fest celebrating Portland's vibrant theater pub culture, this year's Beer and Movie Fest (BAM) has an uneven lineup, but the films worth hitting are really worth hitting—like Woody Allen's Annie Hall, Paul Verhoeven's Starship Troopers, and John Woo's Hard Boiled, all of which play this week on 35mm at the Academy.

The fest's other, less exciting selections include Road House, Kelly's Heroes, and Where Eagles Dare.

WOW. Wow oh wow oh WOW. Obviously you can pick out the ridiculously contrarian and flat-out WRONG thing he wrote, and like me, your head is ready to explode off the top of your neck. For those just joining us, Mercury film reviewers have two jobs: 1) Go to all the movies for FREE, sniff haughtily, and write, "Didn't like it." And 2) DON'T INSULT THE MOTHERFUCKING CLASSICS.

And so...