Hey, gang. Barack here. Look. It seems our drones have actually killed four Americans without due process. And, well, we're now going to limit who we kill with aerial drones and let the military run the program instead of the CIA. And maybe we will envision a real end to the war on terrorism. Oh... and closing Gitmo! Do you remember closing Gitmo? Because I still do. Yeah, and we're going to try that again, too.... Like me again, you guys? Guys?...
Remember when the CIA used to take VIPs on foreign trips for "enhanced" interrogation? This is what that looked like.
Pious business owners really don't like the government making their insurance plans pay for workers' condoms and birth-control pills.
You don't have to believe in god to hang out in heaven. You just have to not be an asshole. New pope says!
A soldier's beheading in London, ruled an act of terror, could have been far worse if not for the fearlessness of a bus-riding nurse who bounded over and patiently tried to calm down the attackers until police arrived.
The Boy Scouts' vote on whether to be a bit less homophobic—allowing openly gay scouts, if not leaders—will be announced later this afternoon.
The FBI shot and killed a Florida man tied to Boston bombing suspect Tamerlan Tsarnaev, allegedly after the man told investigators he was involved in a 2011 slaying also apparently linked to Tsarnaev.
Angry young Swedes, despondent over high unemployment and nursing nativist grudges, have spent the past four days marching around Stockholm—breaking windows, throwing rocks, burning things down, and, most importantly, poking holes in the myth of the Scandinavian miracle state.
Cool kids whose taste buds should know better are messing with hard-core, low-income alcoholics by driving up the price of low-quality beer.
Pussy Riot's Maria Alekhina, now waging a hunger strike, was denied parole by Russian authorities for her failure to "repent" for helping stage an anti-government musical protest inside an Orthodox church.
How did John F. Kennedy tie his shoes? In Nazis!
THIS IS A NOD TO THE PEOPLE WHO WORKED HARD TO VOTE DOWN FLUORIDE AND HOW THEY FEEL WHEN THEY SEE A LONELY "YES" YARD SIGN THAT'S YET TO BE TAKEN DOWN. IT MIGHT ALSO BE SEATTLE.
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