Humanity, as a whole, is terrible and disgusting; the only thing saving us from sliding past the point of no return into a fetid cesspool of vicious lawlessness and unrelenting despair are the few short moments of respite we get when we manage not to think about how things actually are. These brief, desperate spurts of oblivious optimism are what keep us, as individuals, going; it is in this spirt that I offer you the first teaser trailer for the sequel to The Muppets. It's fucking delightful! For one minute and 16 seconds, you'll be able to trick yourself into thinking that things aren't as bad as you suspect they are! Let's do it!
Hooray! What's this sensation, this weird thing my face is—oh! I am smiling right now! Awesome! I had forgotten what it felt like. Thank you, Muppets, and Ricky Gervais, and Tina Fey, for reminding me what it feels like to be happy, truly hap—
WAIT. Is that that one crappy new Muppet from the last movie? Walter? UGH. Walter. Walter is in this? Walter is worse than a fatberg. Everything is terrible again.
Get the best of the Mercury each week in your inbox!