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Tuesday, November 19, 2013

"It's All About Positivity. And Sleeping with Prostitutes."

Posted by Erik Henriksen on Tue, Nov 19, 2013 at 9:44 AM

Hey, three guesses as to which movie looks un-fucking-bearable:

Believe will be pop pap, but holy shit, can you imagine how amazing an actual documentary about Bieber would be? "Right, so then I peed in a bucket, and then I was all 'Fuck Bill Clinton!' but then I met Bill Clintonweird—and then I called a DJ a bitch and spat in his face, and then I spat in some fans' faces, but then I was all, 'Here, let me point a flashlight at women I want to bang, and then start a fight and call someone else a bitch,' and then I took a girl to McDonald's and banged her, and then, after my bodyguards had tackled this guy and he was on the ground, I kicked him, and then I was hella bored so I went to a brothel in Panama City, and then I went to a brothel in Rio, and then I was all 'Oh shit! What if I get banging prostitutes in a brothel?' So then I thought I would be able to sneak out of the brothel so long as I dressed up like a tiny little ghost, obviously, and just remember: Believe in yourself. Believe you can do anything if you set your mind to it."

That movie? That movie I would watch the fuck out of.

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