SPONSORED CONTENT: Did You Say You Prefer Cool Whip to Reddi-wip®, or Am I Drowning in a Sea of Bullshit?
Wm. Steven Humphrey: "Thank you for asking! Tonight, I'm going to drink two long shots of bourbon, and if my mind doesn't collapse, I'm going to the Stay Wild launch party (the bitchin' new outdoor/adventure mag created by the Merc's own Scrappers!). On Sunday I'll be smoking a lot of pot for our upcoming Weed Issue, which gives me a great excuse to avoid the season premiere of Game of Thrones. Oh! And don't forget about Skate-a-Roke benefitting the Rose City Rollers this Monday!"
Alison Hallett: "Tonight I'm going to see Sidekicks at Action/Adventure Theatre, because my boyfriend made it and I have to. I'm going to read Emma Donnaghue's new book Frog Music (for work) and hopefully finish Lawrence Wright's amazing Scientology exposé Going Clear (for fun, THIS BOOK IS CRAZY). And I might starting rewatching Broad City because I miss it already."
Denis "C." Theriault: "My older son is almost six. He thinks things are true that aren't. For instance, one day, when we were downtown, he saw the old Armory building, with its masonry and turrets, and got it in his head that downtown is home to a darling red castle. (He also thinks the long Gunderson terminals on NW Front are shaped that way because a dragon named Gunderson lives there.) Anyway, Portland Center Stage gives free public tours of the Armory on the first and third Saturdays of the month. So that's where we'll be tomorrow. Taking my kid inside a castle."
Courtney Ferguson: "My back is all screwy, so I can't skate at my normal roller derby practices. But I'll probably go to Kay's Bar and revel in the other girls' after-practice glow (read: sweat) for a few beers. I'm also headed to Clyde's Prime Rib for a friend's birthday party, where I'll pretend I'm in an episode of Mad Men. I'll also bop over to the Hollywood Theatre at some point to catch Mistaken for Strangers, the doc about the National that's not really about the National, because Erik and Alison and Ned all liked it so much."
Ned Lannamann: "I'm going to Bad Sports at the Know tonight, then I'll squeeze my way into a very packed Future Islands show at the Doug Fir tomorrow. On Sunday I'm obligated to go to a friend's going-away party; otherwise i would be at RACC's music panel at Dig a Pony. I'm also desperately hoping I can squeeze in the first episode of Game of Thrones' season four sometime later Sunday night. I also have some work to do, since you asked."
Marjorie Skinner: "I'm planning to swing by the Aperitivo Happy Hour at Holocene before checking out First Friday at the 811 E Burnside building. Early Saturday morning I'm headed out to the WildCraft Studio School in White Salmon, WA for a story, and planning on doing some hiking in the Gorge on the way back. Sunday is brunch at my chef friend Colleen French's house and a Game of Thrones viewing party."
Erik Henriksen: "I'm going to hang out outside the Armory so that I can see Denis' kid cry when he realizes the Armory isn't an awesome castle but instead is just some place where rich old people hang out and pretend to enjoy plays."
Dirk VanderHart: "From a pile of clacking lumber and assorted bolts and screws emerges fancy protection, neighborly disdain. My callused hands weep in protest and gratitude. (I'm building a fence, maybe. Probably not if it rains. Which it will. I'm sorry for writing that first stuff.)"