LONG LIVE OREGONIANS! And rest in peace to Cover Oregon. The worst health insurance exchange in all the land was officially scrapped yesterday. We'll shop for our plans on the federal site, like God-fearing Alabamans (and most of the rest of the country).

Here's a fun development as voters decide whether to put the Portland Water Bureau under new management: The bureau's been fined almost $41,000 for not making sure one of its contractors wasn't dumping chlorinated water into Johnson Creek. (Spoiler: The contractor was).

More turnover in Mayor Charlie Hales' office. This time it's his top aide on housing/development leaving for greener pastures.

Either of the top two candidates in Afghanistan's presidential elections—one a formal World Bank economist, the other a big fan of the US—are improvements over outgoing President Hamid Karzai. From Washington's perspective, that is.

From the good folks who brought you Walmart: Charter schools! The Walton Family Foundation is making its presence felt in America's educational system. Maybe too much.

Metaphor for man's steady straying from nature, or just a stupid occurrence? A Washington woman fell while fleeing a duck. Now she's suing.

You might have heard: The Trail Blazers are in the playoffs, are evenly matched with current foe the Houston Rockets, and every game so far has been a classic. Bandwagon time, Portland.

Not entirely surprising: The New York congressman who recently threatened to throw a reporter from a balcony when asked about campaign finance improprieties? Now facing federal charges for those selfsame improprieties.

Help me out with this: Cops arrested a 41-year-old woman named April Adams last night for allegedly stabbing another lady in Fairview. I'm trying to figure out what Adams' forehead tattoo says. James? Ferret? Faust? What do we think?

Cherished golden coins. Never leave the Weather Widget again.

My life is richer for this video's existence. Watch the whole thing, and step up your drunken MAX antics. DC is making us all look foolish.