In theory, when I see a restaurant that has an all-you-can-eat offer I want to take them up on the challenge and ram their marketing ploys straight into my infinite appetite. In practice, though, I can barely manage a couple of helpings at Salty’s all-you-can-eat brunch; meanwhile, other patrons have their plates piled precariously high and I see them going back for more. And more. Sometimes more again. I’m merely an amateur, although I do remember doing okay with the never-ending mimosas. In fact, my only accomplishment in this realm was at a restaurant that offered lunch with continuous champagne pours (Veuve Cliquot, to boot); my friend and I had early reservation but I think we left around 5 pm. The waiting staff didn’t flinch once with the top ups (it was a classy joint), though during a lull one thought we had finished and attempted to take the glasses. Ha! No chance. Shortly after the restaurant finished the offer.
Hence my admiration for Caity Weaver on Gawker who decided to call to account TGI Friday’s ‘Endless Appetizers’ promotion. She writes:
I wanted to challenge the hubris of a company co-opting the infinite for a marketing gimmick.
I wanted to demand accountability from copywriters.
I wanted to call their bluff and eat appetizers until they kicked me out, to seek the limit of this supposedly limitless publicity stunt.
A woman after my own heart. The article is an amusing, blow-by-blow account of working her way through seven plates of mozzarella sticks (six on a plate, they’re twice the size of regular ones) that in turn becomes an existential rumination on spending 14 hours on her own in TGI Friday’s with no amusement (she's not allowed to get drunk, read, sleep); there are only the mozzarella sticks, which taste “worse than garbage”. Still, the restaurant is as good as its claim and doesn't try to limit her appetizer ingestion—she could potentially have had more, though I doubt she could have handled another helping of congealed cheese; on reaching home, she throws up but, as she writes, "not as much as I expected”.