Live from the Moda Center as the Portland Trail Blazers host the Chicago Bulls.

Well, most of the Bulls anyway. Derrick Rose is out with a strained hamstring or bum ankles or general ennui or whatever. Rose sitting was to be expected, but both Pau Gasol and Kirk Hinrich will miss tonight’s contest as well. Hey, Joakim Noah, how do you feel about your teammates missing time? Oh, I see. Okay then.

The Blazers are going for their own spin on the injury carousel—Nicolas Batum is finally returning to action tonight after missing the last four games (hooray!), but CJ McCollum is taking his place on the shelf with a broken finger. CJ doesn’t need surgery, but he’ll have to keep his finger guns holstered for the next four weeks.

It's probably good Rose is sitting tonight. The last time he was on this court, things...didn't go so well.

PRE-GAME:
This Bulls team is not the same cobbled together offensive unit from the past few years—it's no longer Nate Robinson and Carlos Boozer holding things together with bubblegum and dreams. The additions of Pau Gasol and Nikola Mirotic, plus the emergence of Jimmy Butler, have helped vault them to top ten status on that side of the ball. Oh, and they still have that same stifling defense. Once Rose comes back from all his “DNP-Sad”’s, Chicago should be a lock for the Eastern Conference Finals. Somewhere, Carlos Boozer just dejectedly muttered “and one” to himself.

The bad news for the Bulls is they are coming to the Moda Center on the second night of a back to back with Aaron Brooks as their only healthy point guard. It will be tough going against a well-rested Portland team that hasn’t played since Monday.

Despite a couple of narrow, come from behind victories in the last few weeks, everything about this Portland team right now is on point. They’ve faced the third-toughest schedule yet have the fourth-best margin of victory in the league, and they're ranked in the top ten in both offensive and defensive rating. Even the national media is starting to take notice.

According to Neil Young it’s better to burn out than to fade away, but that’s only because LaMarcus Aldridge wasn’t around in 1979. Seriously, look at this work of art. Time to update the Jumpman logo to a silhouette of Aldridge’s jumper with twelve fire emojis in the background.

FIRST QUARTER:
10:32 - Well, Batum looks okay. He got the scoring started by curling off of a pick and gliding to the rim for an easy layup. 2-0 Blazers.

8:50 - Aldridge for three! I don't think I'll ever get sick of typing that. 9-3 Blazers.

7:34 - Credit to Bulls coach Tom Thibodeau. His guys are struggling mightily—they're 1-8 from the floor here early—but he's letting them play through it. 13-3 Blazers.

6:41 - Well, I guess you can only give up so many points before calling time. The Bulls need a break after giving up a Lillard three-pointer, and Portland has jumped out to a thirteen point lead here early. The Bulls are missing shots, but they also seem to be about a half-step slow. 16-3 Blazers.

4:22 - Wesley Matthews developing post game is just the best. He had the bigger Mike Dunleavy on him, but was able to back him down, spin, and get right to the rim for the basket and the foul. 22-7 Blazers.

3:54 - Aldridge for three! I'll stop writing about it when he stops doing it. 25-9 Blazers.

3:01 - LaMarcus is having himself a game. That's ten points already, including two hits from deep. Too bad this is shaping up to be a total blowout, otherwise he might have a chance at a huge night. If things keep going how they're going, though, he might not even come out for the second half. 28-11 Blazers.

1:03 - The Bulls just strung together five straight points. That feels like it might be their longest run of the night. 28-16 Blazers.

0:00 - Shot clock off, final possession—guess who had the ball in his hands? Dame drove, collapsed the defense, and dished to an open Chris Kaman under the basket for an easy layup. Lillard already has seven (!!!) assists on the night. 32-21 Blazers.

SECOND QUARTER:
10:17 - The beginning of second quarters: where Steve Blake dribbling for twenty seconds a possession happens. 34-23 Blazers.

9:32 - Portland's bench was on the verge of undoing all the good the starters had accomplished, but a Chris Kaman and one pushed the lead back into double digits. Whew. 37-27 Blazers.

7:20 - The Bulls have a ragtag bench unit in, but dudes are playing hard. Back to back threes from Tony Snell and E'Twaun Moore have all but erased Portland's lead. Coach Stotts needs time. 39-35 Blazers.

5:22 - Matthews was called for a loose ball foul battling for a rebound on one end, but made up for it by hitting the post on the offensive end. He sunk a pretty little teardrop floater over Nikola Mirotic. 45-37 Blazers.

4:18 - Well, there's that lead again. Back to back triples for Dame. Timeout Chicago. 51-39 Blazers.

2:14 - LaMarcus demolished a Mirotic layup on one end, and was rewarded by getting the ball in the post on offense. Of course he sunk the fadeaway over Mirotic. 57-39 Blazers.

1:39 - Oh man, Allen Crabbe is all about that national TV spotlight. On a breakaway, he stuffed home the dunk of Portland's season over Tony Snell. Chicago needs time to recoup from all that destruction. You'll be seeing that one again. 59-39 Blazers.

0:00 - Aldridge has fourteen points. Dame has thirteen points, eight assists, and five rebound. Allen Crabbe has one soul-crushing dunk. It's amazing what playing a tired, injured team can do for your offense. 61-43 Blazers.

THIRD QUARTER:
11:35 - Wesley Matthews starts the quarter off by picking Mike Dunleavy's pocket and scoring with ease on a one-man fast break. 63-43 Blazers.

9:48 - Fight! Dunleavy "contested" a Lillard three by running up to him and giving him a two-hand shove right in the chest. Didn't even pretend that he was trying to do anything other than knock Dame down. Matthews took exception (because duh), came up to Dunleavy and gave him a push to stick up for his point guard. Aaron Brooks somehow decided he'd get into the mix and had to be held back. They are reviewing it now, but Dunleavy should be ejected with Matthews and Brooks both getting techs. 63-45 Blazers.

9:48 - Huh, so Dunleavy only got a flagrant one, which means he's allowed to stay in the game. Brooks and Matthews were both hit with offsetting techs. Lillard got three freebies, sank them all, and it's still Portland's ball. 66-45 Blazers.

7:38 - Dunleavy getting booed every time he touches the ball. Good. I hope Dame gets his triple double then dedicates the game ball to Mikey D. 72-49 Blazers.

6:04 - Oh no, Taj Gibson is on the ground and writhing in pain. I missed the play, but he seems to be clutching his lower leg, like maybe it's a high ankle sprain. He's getting helped off the court, unable to put any weight on his leg. Ugh, this is just the worst. The Bulls should just forfeit every other Portland game from here on out—nothing good happens for them on this court. 72-51 Blazers.

3:30 - Five straight points for Dame, including his fourth three of the night. He's not going to miss again. Book it. 84-58 Blazers.

2:49 - Fun stat of the night: Dame is +41 in his 26 minutes of action. 84-58 Blazers.

1:40 - If I were a betting man, I'd put all my money on Steve Blake and Aaron Brooks getting in a fight before this night is over. 89-61 Blazers.

0:00 - With the skirmish and the Taj Gibson injury, the rest of that quarter felt like both teams were just playing out the string. The Blazers are going to win this one, the only question is whether the bench can hold up enough to keep the starters off the floor in the fourth. 89-65 Blazers.

FOURTH QUARTER:
11:26 - Meyers Leonard into the game. Meyers Leonard getting lost on a pick and roll and giving up a Mirotic three. 89-68 Blazers.

10:18 - Who wins between Meyers Leonard's mustache and Nikola Mirotic's beard? Stay tuned to find out. (Just kidding, it's the mustache. It's always the mustache.) 93-69 Blazers.

8:50 - Mirotic picked up a clear path foul by bear hugging Crabbe on a breakaway. It looked a lot worse than it was, but after the shenanigans earlier the crowd let Nikola hear it. 95-69 Blazers.

7:24 - Thomas Robinson is in, the crowd is starting to file out, and this one is over with over half a quarter left. Sorry, national audience, for such a dud of a game. This one was never even close. 95-71 Blazers.

4:58 - The Blazers have scored two points in the last five and a half minutes, yet still have over a twenty point lead. Basketball! 95-74 Blazers.

3:34 - Will Barton: Savior. Just when the offense looked like it might never score again, he faked a pass to the corner, cradled the ball, and drove for the pretty layup. The People's Champ, indeed. 97-79 Blazers.

2:30 - Meyers Leonard is the new Luke Babbitt, sinking a three for free fries. If he grows out his hair into a Babbitt-esque bowl cut, you might as well just shut down the internet. 100-84 Blazers.

FINAL: 105-87 Blazers. Portland sure had that one on lock. That's six in a row for the rolling Blazers, who will now jet out for a three-game road trip against some easier Eastern Conference opponents.