Originally posted on December 21, 2011.

I'm a submissive gay man. All anal sex guides stress that when done right, anal sex should cause no pain. But what if I want pain? Over three years, my boyfriend and I have proceeded from having lots of anal foreplay to lube-it-up-and-stick-it-in. I love it, and once it stops hurting, as it always does after a while, I have amazing orgasms. So does he. There's a definite line between the arousing kind of pain and too much pain. But that line has moved closer to more intense pain, and I'm worried about injury. Then again, we're not sticking progressively bigger objects up my ass, just the same object with less foreplay. Is this risky?

Boy Used To Taking

My response after the jump...

It depends, BUTT.

You can enjoy lube-it-up-and-stick-it-in anal without incurring too great a risk of injury so long as your boyfriend isn't shoving his entire dick up your ass in one thrust. If he's pushing his dick in you gradually but firmly, giving your poor butt a chance to relax and adjust as he "forces" his way in, then you'll probably be okay.

That said, BUTT, while it's a fine thing to enjoy a little pain during sex—or "sensation play," as the kinksters have taken to calling it—making your asshole the focus of erotic pain isn't a sensational idea. Anal fissures and tears take forever to heal, and even a small one can put your ass out of commission for months. A big one can put your ass out of commission for years.

There are plenty of ways your boyfriend can make you hurt during anal without brutalizing your hole. He can slap your ass, yank on a pair of tit clamps, pull your hair, crank up the juice on an e-stim unit. You've got nerve endings all over your body, not just in and around your hole.