So begins one of Scott Poole's poems from his new poetry collection Sliding Glass Door, which he read from at last night's Planned Parenthood storytelling benefit "It's Not Me, It's You." I bought the book for my mother as a thank-you present for not actually attending the event, because his poems are hilarious and poignant and I think she would like them, and also because I am very grateful she didn't show up to hear any of the mom-unfriendly stories I told during my lightening-round face-off with Sarah Mirk. Sarah won our portion of events, unsurprisingly (she has some of the worst dating stories ever, and in fact I think she should share some of them in the comments... Sarah?), taking home a copy of fellow storyteller Sarah Wexler's Awful First Dates as her victory spoils. And in a stroke of divine, hilarious coincidence, the story Wexler read was about going on a date with the author of a cookbook called How to Get Laid—attentive readers will recognize that as a thinly veiled reference to the Cook to Bang guy, whom I got into an email fight with a couple years ago. I still can't believe she actually went on a date with the dude who invented "Get Stuffed and Bust-a-Nut Squash." Amazing.

Thanks to everybody who turned up last night, and to hosts Cort and Fatboy for being their typical hilarious selves, boner jokes and all. It was a great crowd and doubtless raised some serious cash for Planned Parenthood Advocates of Oregon. And hey, if you missed it? You can still give 'em some money right here.

The Portland Opera opened Madame Butterfly this past weekend. Recently I sat down for a generous and sprightly chat with Caitlin Mathes (the mezzo-soprano who plays Kate Pinkerton) and André Chiang (the baritone who plays Yamidori) at the Portland Opera studios. They told me some surprising things, and tried to shut down some preconceptions about the art form, informing me that opera does not require fancy clothes. Nor is it just for old people (both Mathes and Chiang are in their 20s). Nor is it expensive (or, at least, not always). Madame Butterfly is a period piece, set in the early 20th century, so Chiang and Mathes tried to frame it within the landscape of the current entertainment industry...e.g. television.

A review of the show will appear in the Mercury's forthcoming print issue. Read an excerpt of our Q&A, after the jump.

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Which is why this made me laugh. From the band poster show at Meat Cheese Bread (home of the best breakfast burritos in Portland, I will fight anyone who says different):

(Sorry, Angry Internet Person... Wait, no I'm not. I also took this picture yesterday.)

• Hellion Gallery

Guys! Lots of art shows opening tonight and tomorrow! If you plan on hitting up any first weekend exhibitions, follow along below for some highlights, including a show by Jim Neidhardt at Blackfish that weighs the value of display devices against the content viewed therein, a pink argument in favor of fate by Gabe Flores at Half/Dozen, and one white kid's attempt to become a Latin pop star at Recess. All this and more, after the jump.

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This Flickr set is full of images drawn during Mike Daisey's 24-hour monologue at TBA this past fall. It's worth a look.

You may remember Ashby Lee Collinson's scene-stealing apple bite as one of the cult/farm leader's many wives on the first episode of Portlandia. I have been crazy for her multi-media project, Princess Dies, since the 3rd episode premiered at the TBA 2011 Experimental Half Hour showcase.

• Before this I was just medium crazy.

Now Ashby wants to take her show (and video editor) on the road, through the High Sierra mountains and Mojave desert to an art residency with the Wonder Valley Land Art Project. She's already a third of the way to her $5,000 goal. She and Rebecca Carlisle-Healy made this pretty excellent video about it.

I'm excited to see what on earth will happen. Her proposal promises: "Working with the inhospitable Mojave Desert—documenting the body of the landscape in connection with omni-sexuality and consciousness—the installment will address relationships between the body, landscape and virtuality through the medium of nature videography." Shit is gonna be freaked out, dudes.

PRINCESS DIES 4 LYFE

Recently on Twitter, the One True B!x commented that he wished he could listen to Radiolab's content without the "highly annoying storytelling style," an opinion I think a lot of people share. But I actually really like the show's conversational format—it's a constant reminder of the limitations of reporting, that history is made up of loads of peoples' different perspectives all jumbled together. Plus, the integration of sounds and music is really impressive. The Atlantic's Alex Madrigal feels the same way, and he takes it a step further with a piece today about how Radiolab is "changing the sound of the radio":

[O]ur cultural expectations of radio — funneled through different technological listening devices — are changing. It may be broadcast over traditional airwaves, but it's webby. It feels interactive and interrogative rather than narrowly investigative. [Jad] Abumrad and [Robert] Krulwich aren't coming from on high, but right there with the listener adventuring through the story.

Radiolab is actually post-blog and post-livestream. It's not aping the oratory of old or the raggedness of the new. It's a hybrid that takes lessons from the past, recent and deep.

I'm not sure I buy this "Radiolab is shifting the paradigm" stuff—the show's been around for a while, after all, and I think these observations about storytelling style equally apply to This American Life (did everyone listen to the Mike Daisey episode, BTW?). But it is interesting to consider lines of influence in the podcasting boom—the Memory Palace can feel at times like a little slice of Radiolab, for example.

My ulterior motive for posting about Radiolab is this: If you haven't listened to their Patient Zero episode—which explores the story of Typhoid Mary, follows the AIDS virus to its source, and traces the surprisingly tragic history of the high-five—go do it. It is an incredible piece of research and storytelling.

It’s the first week of the new year! Celebrate the slough-off of 2011 by checking out some art. Our art connoisseur Matt Stangel is out of town, so I'm filling in to highlight some First Thursday action.

For starters:

• Ethan Rose, Reflections

Ethan Rose has been tinkering again. PDX Contemporary presents his show Reflection, which hooks up electro-mechanical bells to speakers, to ding-dong in all sorts of weird ways. (Rose had a big show at MoCC a couple years ago, as well as participated in TBA '09.) 925 NW Flanders, 5:30-7:30 pm.

• A Japanese print among the many in The Artist's Touch The Craftsman's Hand

The Portland Art Museum is offering a tour tonight of The Artist’s Touch The Craftsman’s Hand (their exhibition of Japanese Prints). Good thing too, because it is (1) an awesome show and (2) a giant overwhelming show, with somewhere around 250 prints from PAM’s collection. I want a rotating exhibition of the work in my house but am settling for the exhibition catalogue. 1219 SW Park Ave, 6 pm.

Click the jump for more sneak peaks, including Yoda, fake news, and a certain basketball player...holding a PUPPY!

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