Over on End Hits, we're giving away a pair of tickets to see Ghost B.C. at the Wonder Ballroom this Friday, April 26. Are you feeling brave enough to bear witness to their evil liturgy? Then go forth and win, sinner.
This coming Tuesday, on April 2, Talib Kweli comes to Portland's Hawthorne Theatre with not just a huge back catalog of hits, but also some new songs from his forthcoming album Prisoner of Conscious, due out April 23. And the legendary emcee will be performing with a live band. Plus! Portland's own hiphop-and-beyond practitioners Chicharones are on the bill, making this a can't-miss evening of excitement.
This is a damn fine bill and a rowdy Tuesday night, and we're giving away a pair of tickets to a lucky End Hits reader. BUT: You have to go over to End Hits to enter. So go already!
It's colder then a flagpole's erect nob out there! That's why we put a warm, fuzzy ski mask on the Mercury's cover for you. If for some reason these paper masks don't keep you warm, or get stuck to your snotty little nose, you can enter to win $100 worth of Mercperk$ to Deek and Bryan’s Next Adventure. With those Mercperk$ you can buy a real ski mask!
Wanna win? Cut the mask out. Put it on your face. Take a photo. Then, post it anywhere/everywhere on the ’nets (Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr, Flickr), with the hashtag #portlandmercury. Or! Email your photo to
It so easy even kids can do it!
We're giving away a pair of tickets to that show AND a copy of the screenprinted poster, designed by Mike King of Crash America. That's right: Win a pair of tickets to the show and the collectible poster.
Want to win? Do grizzly bears like honey?! Well, then you'd better get over to End Hits. That's where it's all going down.
Wanna get spritzy? Win a pair of tickets to see Hot Water Music at the Hawthorne Theatre on Wednesday, October 3.
How, you ask? By clicking over to End Hits, you big lug! May the spritziest win!
So I get an email from somebody—I forget who—that asked, "Hey, do you want the second season DVD of Portlandia that will be officially released on September 25 (also in Blu Ray)?" And without thinking, I replied, "Sure." (I caught chlamydia under very similar circumstances.) Anyway, I forgot completely about it until it showed up in my mailbox today, and I was all like, "UGHH! I don't want this!" But then I remembered laughing at that long line of dummies outside the Hollywood Theatre waiting to see last season's premiere episode on the big screen, and I was like... "Waitasecond... maybe someone might actually want this terrible thing!" So I dug it out of the recycling (Question: Should I put it in with paper, glass or compost?), and wrote this blog post, hoping you'd take it off my hands. THE END.
Oh, wait. I haven't done the contest yet. OKAY, HERE'S THE CONTEST! Would you like the new Portlandia Season Two two-disc DVD for your very own? Email me here, and put "I'll be nice and take that Portlandia DVD off your hands. GROSS!" in the subject line. (If you win, I'll email you back for your address.) Contest ends at noon tomorrow (Tuesday) because I'll be bored by then. Hurry up—it's just sitting on my desk, and it makes me depressed to look at it.
UPDATE: Some kind Blogtown soul has agreed to take the DVD off my hands. The contest is over, and thanks for playing!
This Saturday, Sept 22, Back Fence, PDX is hosting a nerd-themed edition of their popular storytelling series, and they've got some awesome, high-profile names lined up. I'm particular excited to see writer/ace birthday party thrower Matt Fraction, who is kind of a Big Deal in the comics world for his work on titles like Invincible Iron Man and Casanova; and the hilarious Lindy West, formerly of The Stranger, currently of Jezebel, whose "The Different Kinds of People That There Are" is one of my favorite things we've ever run in the Mercury.
Also on board (let's let the press release do our thinking for us):
Best Selling Thriller writer CHELSEA CAIN, Former High School Mathlete GABE CARLETON-BARNES, writer for Nerdist.com, io9.com and co-host of a weekly podcast on geekandsundry.com channel KIALA KAZEBEE, and math genius/creator of video games, BRUCE OBERG.
Should be an excellent night. If you want to win a pair of tickets, simply email me with "#nerd" in the subject line by 9 am tomorrow morning, and I'll pick one at random. (Make sure to include your full name in your email.) The winner will be notified; the losers will have their emails heartlessly deleted without a second thought.
Tickets to the show are $12-15 and available here, if you'd rather not take your chances.
Hello, lover of swoony, dark, romantic, girl-group-ish, fuzzy Danish rock. We have a pair of tickets for you, to go see the Raveonettes at the Hawthorne Theatre on Friday, September 21.
(Not here. Over on End Hits. Go and win, you.)
We've got a pair of tickets to the show, and we're giving them over on End Hits! You know what to do.
Over on End Hits, we're giving away one more pair of tickets to see Refused tomorrow night at the Roseland. Go forth and win!
Cat Power is coming! She's playing the Crystal Ballroom on Sunday, November 4, and we're giving away a pair of tickets to one lucky reader. Could that reader be you?
Say yea! Yeasayer are coming to the Crystal Ballroom on Friday, August 31, and we've got a pair of tickets just for you. Not here, they're over on End Hits!
Over on End Hits, we're giving away a pair of tickets to see Poliça and Supreme Cuts at the Wonder Ballroom on Saturday, August 18!
Who? Wha? Huh? Go over to listen to the bands and win.
Before you get excited about a new Morty Fineman film, let me clarify: Zach's Shack, the beloved and timeless hot dog restaurant on SE Hawthorne, is holding its annual Hot Dog Eating Contest on Sunday, August 26th, at 4pm. Here are some simple facts to put things in context, and also to make clear how much room for improvement there is this year:
In 2011, Zach's event was won by a man named Zane who consumed fourteen hot dogs in ten minutes.
Also in 2011, Japan's Takeru Kobayashi consumed sixty-nine hot dogs in twelve minutes, competing not in Nathan's famous Coney Island competition, but against it. That's right: Kobayashi didn't just win a hot dog eating contest, he beat a hot dog eating contest. Now that is plucky.
The question is: who will eat fifty-four fewer hot dogs than Kobayashi this year? Or, do us proud and eat fifty-three fewer? Numerically, such a victory seems easy, but perhaps ask the man who nearly won Zach's contest with a total of fifteen hot dogs last year, then lost by barfing out fifteen hot dogs.
The details, and some interesting photos, are at the Zach's Shack site.
Long before Cults, or Cloud Cult, or Pure Bathing Culture, or Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam—but not, it should be mentioned, before Blue Öyster Cult—there was the Cult, the one and only British hard rockers that incorporated elements of goth, metal, and Lemmy-style chug into a high-octane sound. After some big hits, a breakup, a reunion, and another hiatus, the Cult are now still going full steam ahead again, and they'll be at Roseland on Monday, August 20. And hey, we've got a pair of tickets to give away!
That's all happening over on End Hits. Go there and and win!
Ever wanted to squeeze $300 from the rapidly desiccating corpse of print media? THEN READ ON!
If you haven't already submitted 300 terror-filled words to our True Tales of TriMet Terror contest, now's pretty much your last chance—the contest ends at noon. So get squeezing.
YES, THE TRAM COUNTS.
We're creeping up on the deadline for the Mercury's True Tales of TriMet Terror contest—when one
lucky unlucky I guess it depends on how you look at it reader will win $300 for sharing their most horrific amusing horrifically amusing tale of a TriMet expedition gone awry! We've received some pretty good entries so far (and one that was super racist!), but I've only seen one that truly turned my stomach—which means if you've got a great TriMet story, you've still got a good shot at that $300! Send your story to firstname.lastname@example.org—see below for details. Deadline is THIS WEDNESDAY AT NOON. Get to it.
That address again: email@example.com.
Over on End Hits, we're giving away tickets to see Dirty Projectors and Wye Oak at the Crystal Ballroom this coming Wednesday, July 25. This is what we in the music-writing biz call a "hot bill." A "sure thing." A "double threat." A "holy fudgesicles this is going to be a good show and you'd be out of your mind to miss it."
Over on End Hits, we're giving away tickets to see Grizzly Bear at the Keller on October 4. Go over and win some of that sweet honey! Don't hibernate on this one! It's a great off-fur! Click quick, and get away from these un-bear-able puns!
If the statement "We're giving away a pair of tickets to see Young Magic at the Doug Fir on Saturday, July 14!" makes you say "Yay! I want to win!" then go over to End Hits and enter our contest.
If that statement makes you say, "Who with the what now?" then take a listen to a stream of Young Magic's album in full below, after the jump. (And then go over to End Hits and win!)
No, not ELP, you prog-alicious nerd. El-P! Totally different guy. And Killer Mike! Who is nicer than his name makes him sound.
Get over to End Hits and win big, why don'tcha!
Last chance to win My Morning Jacket tickets! It's all going down over on End Hits. Click and win! And then go about your day.
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