This Week in the Mercury

The Nothing Eaters

Feature

The Nothing Eaters

How Floating in a Sensory-Deprivation Tank Made Me Feel... Well... Nothing.


Comfort in Being Sad

Music

Comfort in Being Sad

Los Campesinos! Find Their Lot in Life



Friday, February 3, 2012

Tomorrow at TFAW: Ladies Night Drink and Draw

Posted by Alison Hallett on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 5:14 PM

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One thing I really enjoy about Portland's comic book community is how gender-balanced it is; there are plenty of women involved in all aspects of the industry, from editors to creators. For a hint of the diversity on display, take last night's pair of First Thursday openings: Natalie Nourigat and Emi Lenox presented charming autobiographical comics at Floating World, while a few blocks away at the Sequential Art Gallery, Carolyn Main offered up a mixed-media exhibit of poop jokes and elaborately illustrated penises.

Tomorrow night, the Hollywood Things from Another World is hosting a women-only Drink and Draw event, which will be kicked off by a panel Q&A with a lineup of "notable local women connected to the comics industry" including Colleen Coover (Gingerbread Girl), Kelly Sue DeConnick (Supergirl), Cat Farris (Legend of Larsha 2), Emi Lenox (Emitown), Jen Van Meter (Avengers Solo), and Dark Horse Comics Executive Editor Diana Schutz, and me. (I'm super outclassed by all of these women, but nonetheless pleased to get a chance to talk about the Merc's comics coverage and Comics Underground, and also to have my name on a poster with She Hulk.)

Anyway, that's from 7-9 pm. Any women interested in drinking, drawing, listening, or mingling are welcome to attend—free beer and wine with ID. If any Blogtown readers show up, say hi!

Who's Lobbying The City and Why?

Posted by Nathan Gilles on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 4:51 PM

The Portland city auditor released its quarterly lobbying report today. You can read through the report and find out out who lobbied city officials about what, and how much money they spent. Not surprisingly, Occupy Portland appears more than once in the record.

Columbia Biogas
Number one in dollars, number three in lobbying instances
Dollars Spent: $2,575.00
Lobbying instances reported: 15

Columbia Biogas has big plans to turn food waste from Portland's restaurants and grocery stores into clean electricity for 5,000 homes. The company, which had a public comment period in late November of last year, has been in the process of getting permits for its new $40 million plant, and the record shows this.

The company reports meeting with members of city council as well as members of Environmental Services and the Bureau of Planning and Sustainability to discuss the facility.

The Portland Business Alliance
Number two in dollars spent, number one in lobbying instances
Dollars Spent:$1227.32
Lobbying instances reported: 34

It looks like Occupy Portland was on the minds of the the Portland Business Alliance.

Instances in the lobbying record include emails to Sam Adams about security and cleaning up the city’s parks. The group also met with the Mayor personally in October to talk about downtown street closures, and again in early November with the Mayor and Amanda Fritz to talk directly about Occupy Portland.

Oregon Health and Science University (OHSU)
Number three in dollars spent, number four in lobbying instances
Dollars Spent: 569.86
Lobbying instances reported: 8

Not surprising OHSU reported meetings with Adams staffers about the Mayor’s Campus Connection Initiative.

Continue reading »

First Friday Picks

Posted by Marjorie Skinner on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 4:08 PM

It started out as basically confined to the 811 E Burnside building, but inner SE's First Fridays are starting to pull more and more muscle, thanks in part to new venues like Union/Pine, which tonight is hosting Duo, a series of two-man collaborations boastinging notable names like photographer Randall Garcia and apparel designer/musician/food blogger/artist Emily Katz as well as a bar and the party-friendly hours of 7 pm-midnight.

Meanwhile their advertising firm neighbors at Sandymontana are starting their first-ever FF exhibit, titled "Oddservations: Case Study #0001." They explain it thusly: "Oddservations is a collection of observatory research that has been gathered from an unknown world, consisting of its inhabitants and other found objects. Case Study #0001 is the first of the Oddservations series." (Relevant, but if nothing else I am curious to see their offices.) That is 6-9 pm.

Lastly, Aequanimitas has added another to their fold: the ceramics of multi-media artist Nicky Kriara, whose work ranges from offbeat takes on typical objects like vases and pots to sculptural installations like these braille cassette tapes. Pop in from 6:30-10.

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  • Nicky Kriara

Last Chance to Submit Your Mercury Reader Valentine!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 3:29 PM

Oh, sure! You can TRY to blame the Mercury for supposedly not running the mooshy-gushy reader valentine that you FORGOT to submit. But rest assured I will happily fling open the doors of our entire database to your lover, just so you will be exposed for what you are: A NO GOOD, TRIFLING LIAR.

Would you like to avoid this embarrassment?

Then by all means, SUBMIT YOUR FREE MERCURY VALENTINE HERE AND NOW, because the print deadline is tomorrow Saturday, February 4! And while you can still post your valentine online—that's a fucking joke and you know it. That's like giving your lover a coupon for a personal pan pizza on her birthday. SEND IN YOUR MERCURY VALENTINE NOW, AND FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, MAKE IT ROMANTIC. Love is this close to giving up on you.

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IPRC Signs Lease on New Location

Posted by Alison Hallett on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 3:14 PM

This is big news: In a few weeks, the Independent Publishing Resource Center will be packing up the letterpresses and moving to new digs at 10th and Division. The lease has been signed; projected move-in date is March 1.

This announcement smacked me with some nostalgia—maybe the same way I would've felt about Rocco's closing if the pizza had been any less terrible. The little stretch of Oak Street that also houses Counter Media and Reading Frenzy has long been one of my favorite blocks in the city, and one that hasn't changed too terribly much in the 13 years since the IPRC opened shop. But there's absolutely no doubt that the IPRC has outgrown their current home, and the new space is almost four times larger than their current home. Other details from the IPRC announcement:


2500 square feet of open, ground-floor workspace with 15' vaulted ceilings
330 square foot conference room (second floor)
900 square feet of ground-floor administrative offices
Small loft space
Fully accessible roof deck with views of downtown and the west hills
double-wide work sink with a high pressure sprayer, which will allow us to create an IPRC screenprinting studio
Roll up garage door
Directly across the street from future Max line
Directly off the #4 and #70 buslines, as well as several bike routes
Great neighbors like Ford Food + Drink, Genies, Los Gorditos Burritos, Double Dragon, Acme bar and beer garden, Pinball Publishing, Free Geek, New Seasons Grocery and more.

Here's a look around the current space, if you've never been in there:

Rick Santorum Still Exists?

Posted by Paul Constant on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 2:58 PM

1. Did you know that Rick Santorum is still in the presidential race? I had to check, but it's true! Apparently, he is very upset about Mitt Romney saying he doesn't care about poor people, too:

We saw something the other day that Mitt Romney said. It sort of sent a chill down my spine as a conservative and a Republican. Mitt Romney said, 'I don't care about the very poor as long as they have a safety net there, I don't really care. If we need to repair the safety net, that's fine, I'm not going to focus on them. I'm going to focus on' — I think he said — 'the 95 percent.' That's not the Republican Party I want to belong to. I want to belong to a party that focuses on 100 percent of Americans and creating opportunity for every single one.

2. But when he's not busy feeling concern for every single American, Rick Santorum is coming down with a bad case of the Glenn Becks, seeing doomsday everywhere:

To hear him tell it, the United States will collapse under the weight of its health care system and basic freedoms will be history. Iran will annihilate Israel and then South Carolina if Iran isn't blocked from building a nuclear weapon. And divorce will yield higher taxes for all Americans.

3. On the lighter side of things, hot tipper Ben sent along what he calls his "nominee for gif of the YEAR." I think I agree with Ben. Check it out... after the jump.

Continue reading »

How to Get a Middle-School Boyfriend: The Definitive Treatise

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 2:14 PM

Some of us (and by "us" I mean "you") aren't quite as lucky as HannahMiller9927 at getting middle-school boyfriends. HannahMiller9927 gets a lot of them, and while her current main boyfriend Robert (who is super cute and not crazy because HannahMiller9927 hates "crazy") is awesome, she's been asked out on dates by THREE other boys this week—soooooooo this obviously makes HannahMiller9927 the world's leading authority on how to snag a middle-school boyfriend. Watch and learn from HannahMiller9927, world. Watch and learn.


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Recaps for Poor People: Love and Money (mostly love) on NBC Thursday

Posted by Elinor Jones on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 1:59 PM

Last night when our stories were about to come on, my husband asked “Isn’t it sad that you have to be working during TV now?” And I said, “Are you kidding? Having an audience for my television musings is a weekly celebration.” And now: it is time to party.

30 Rock

Liz is up to renegotiate her contract at TGS. She discovers tapes of a seminar Jack had given, and takes what she learns there to the table. Liz has learned important tricks, like speaking first and having a hair out of place are signs of weakness. In her meeting with Jack, Jack is tricked into speaking first when:

Power shoes.
  • Power shoes.

(Vomit.)

Jack catches onto what Liz is doing, and that he is negotiating with himself. “It’s a Jack-off!” YES. TIME TO JUMP.

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This Week's Mercury Music Section

Posted by Ned Lannamann on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 1:44 PM

Lost Lander

Another week, another Mercury music section. We ordinarily crack wise here, but it's an incredibly strong week for local releases and shows, with great new records from a bevy of Portland acts. So let's dive right in.

Lost Lander's debut DRRT comes with a fold-out planetarium. We fully expect that future releases from this great new Portland band will include a lodestone, a zoetrope, signal flares, a Swiss army knife, and an ocarina.
LISTEN:

Lost Lander - "Afraid of Summer"

We assume Laura Gibson wanted to name her excellent new album after a town that shares her initials. And the lucky winner in this selective process turned out to be La Grande, Oregon. (Better luck next time, Los Gangeles.)
LISTEN:

Laura Gibson - "La Grande"

The Golden Bears' second record, Write It Like You Find It, is just as good as their first (which was terrific). Recorded at home in their basement, it's a 12-song ode to domesticity and rock and roll—and it turns out those two flavors go together extraordinarily well.
LISTEN:

The Golden Bears - "Come to Be"

Neal Morgan is a singing drummer. But his intriguing new album In the Yard sounds nothing like "In the Air Tonight."
LISTEN:

Neal Morgan - "Fathers Day"

Welsh band Los Campesinos! have grown from precocious youngsters into a grownup band. Don't worry: Their diary-like songs are still as heart-on-the-sleeve as ever.
LISTEN:

Los Campesinos! - "Hello Sadness"

And a lapful of Up & Comings as well.

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What Happened in Vegas: Mitt Romney Tries to Pretend Donald Trump's Endorsement Never Happened

Posted by Paul Constant on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 1:28 PM

Yesterday, Barack Obama's official Twitter feed tweeted video of Donald Trump's endorsement of Mitt Romney. The only comment, before the link to the video: "In case you missed it."

You don't have to be a political expert to know that when your opponent posts your message without any kind of spin, you've made a terrible mistake. An even bigger sign that the Romney campaign has made a huge mistake? There's absolutely no reference to yesterday's Trump endorsement anywhere on Romney's official Twitter feed. The feed mentions endorsements all the time. But if you're just looking at official Romney materials, it's like the Trump endorsement never happened. It's not on the Romney site's home page. A quick search of that site just turns up one lonely press release from yesterday. (John McCain, by contrast, pulls up multiple hits.)

Romney's trying to have it both ways, here. The Trump endorsement was necessary to shore up the fringe, idiot base of the Republican Party. But Romney knows that Trump is a joke, so the official campaign spin is to pretend it never happened. The motherfucker is twisting in the wind, right now, and Newt Gingrich's comment that Romney "is counting on us not having YouTube" is seeming more true every single day.

BREAKING: Trencito To Undergo Knee Surgery, Miss 6-12 Months

Posted by Brian Gjurgevich on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 1:15 PM

Timbers Young Designated Player Jose Adolfo Valencia runs during the first day of preseason training on Jan. 23. Unfortunately for Timbers fans, this may be the closest theyll see to Trencito in action this season—the Timbers announced Friday that the 20-year old would undergo knee surgery and miss 6-12 months.
  • Craig Mitchelldyer/Portland Timbers
  • Timbers Young Designated Player Jose Adolfo Valencia (No. 20) runs during the first day of preseason training on Jan. 23. Unfortunately for Timbers fans, this may be the closest they'll get to seeing "Trencito" in action this season—the Timbers announced Friday that the 20-year old would undergo knee surgery and miss 6-12 months.

Portland: Where young people go to retire have knee surgery.

The Timbers announced today that prize offseason signing Jose Adolfo Valencia—a 20-year old Colombian striker better known as "Trencito"—will undergo surgery to repair damaged cartilage in his left knee and miss 6-12 months.

Valencia, who hasn't practiced with the team since the second day of training camp due to "medical testing" that raised "red flags," will stay in Portland to rehab.

The Timbers front office had been tight-lipped about the status of their first-ever Young Designated Player, which caused speculation to run rampant about what was wrong with the Colombia U-20 National Teamer. Turns out, Portland's brass was busy working behind the scenes to amend Valencia's loan agreement from his Colombian club. The result? Trencito will not count as a Young Designated Player this season and will remain on the Timbers' Disabled List, meaning he won't take up a spot on the team’s roster or count as an international player.

“Our No. 1 priority is ensuring the long-term physical health of Jose,” said Timbers general manager Gavin Wilkinson. “We are pleased to have worked with his former club in Colombia on amended terms of his transfer, considering the circumstances. We are very committed to Jose as a person and as a player, and intend to return to the original terms of his transfer agreement when he returns to full health following rehabilitation.”

Read more on the Timbers' official site and follow fan reaction on #RCTID.

Blu-ray Reviews: Boardwalk Empire, To Kill a Mockingbird, Star Trek: The Next Generation, and Woody Allen

Posted by Jamie S. Rich on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 12:57 PM

ATTN. CINEPHILES—Hey, look! Jamie and I watched some things on our televisions! Now we will tell you whether or not you should buy them! —Erik

BOARDWALK EMPIRE This is the nicest Nucky gets.
  • BOARDWALK EMPIRE This is the nicest Nucky gets.

Boardwalk Empire: The Complete First Season
For two seasons, HBO’s Boardwalk Empire has been a blood-soaked romp through the Prohibition. It stars Steve Buscemi as politician-slash-gangster Nucky Thompson, the criminal czar of Atlantic City, and details his personal travails as he trades gunshots and whiskey with the likes of Al Capone and Lucky Luciano. The series—which has the distinction of having the world’s most disparate executive production team of Martin Scorsese, who regularly reinvigorates cinema, and Mark Wahlberg, who invented Entourage and failed to stop 9/11—is a mixture of Shakespearian tragedy and the best of motion picture history. It’s also part of television's laying claim to territory once occupied by the Great American Novel. Boardwalk Empire is not a show to watch randomly, whenever you happen to catch an episode on the air. It’s a complete work that only makes sense when consumed as a whole.

All the better, then, that HBO has seen fit to release Boardwalk's complete first season on Blu-ray, making it easier than ever to consume volume one of this epic saga in its entirety. You get everything: all 12 episodes, including the Scorsese-directed pilot, as well as all the expected audio commentaries and mini-documentaries.

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It's Happening Tonight!

Posted by Alison Hallett on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 12:28 PM

BENDER—It's time to have the funnest blackout you'll never remember with the annual Slabtown Bender. Drink 'em up and dance 'em down at this weekend-long series of shows, tonight with the Trashies, TacocaT, and Unnatural Helpers. Plus Saturday and Sunday you can start out the festivities with free matinees. Hydrate, folks, hydrate—this is for the long haul. CF
Slabtown, 1033 NW 16th, Fri-Sun, 5 pm, $10 ($25 for all weekend)

REVENGE OF THE SYNTH—It's time again for another round of Superfresh, a two-day extravaganza that will have you wearing holes in your dancing shoes, with a slew of performances from Wampire, Litanic Mask, Tunnels, and so many more. Don't forget to stretch those hamstrings. MS
Branx, 320 SE 2nd, Fri-Sat 7:30 pm, $7, $10 weekend pass, all ages

Tonight in Music

Posted by Courtney Ferguson on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 12:14 PM

Shut Your Animal Mouth (Via)
  • Shut Your Animal Mouth (Via)

East EndShut Your Animal Mouth, Guantanamo Baywatch, 9 pm, free
Aladdin Theater—The Wood Brothers, Sarah & Christian Dugas, 8 pm, $16-18
Al's Den—Marty Marquis, Thousands, Tom Bevitori, 7 pm, free
Backspace—The Sexbots, Dropa, Stereovision, 9 pm, $7, all ages
Branx—Superfresh: Wampire, Strategy, Truckasaurus, Jonny X & The Groadies, Litanic Mask, Vice Device, Light House, DJ Maxx Bass, 7 pm, $7, all ages
Dante's—12th Anniversary: Murder City Devils, P.R.O.B.L.E.M.S, Sassparilla, 9 pm, $20
Doug Fir—DJ Cooky Parker, DJ Beyonda, 9 pm, $5
Hawthorne Theatre—The Builders & The Butchers, Quiet Life, Turbo Perfecto, 7 pm, $13-15
LaurelThirst Public House—James Low Western Front, 6 pm; Lewi Longmire, Meridian, 9:30 pm
Lola's Room—Annual HER Human Rights Campaign Dance Benefit: DJ Anjali, 7 pm, $10; '80s Video Dance Attack: VJ Kittyrox, 9 pm, $5
Mississippi Studios—Laura Gibson, Breathe Owl Breathe, Mike Midlo, 9 pm, $10-12
Slabtown—Slabtown Bender: The Trashies, Top Ten, Unnatural Helpers, Stan McMahon Band, Denizenz, TacocaT, Huff Stuff Magazine, The Needful Longings, Arctic Flowers, Billions & Billions, Mom, 5 pm, $10

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Q&A with Portland's Planned Parenthood President on Komen Funding Decision

Posted by Sarah Mirk on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 11:44 AM

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I met this morning with Planned Parenthood Columbia Willamette President David Greenberg, who squeezed in our interview between TV crews and his cell phone ringing off the hook. Everyone wants to talk about the big news from the Susan G. Komen Foundation—first, that the breast cancer research foundation pulled funding from Planned Parenthood, then that Oregon's chapter of the Komen foundation wrote an angry letter opposing the move, then that the national Komen foundation made a big backtrack this morning. While the local Planned Parenthood doesn't receive any money from Komen grants to begin with, Oregon has the highest per capita use of Planned Parenthood of any state.

MERCURY: When did you hear about Komen's reversal and what was your first reaction?
DAVID GREENBERG: Well, actually, it's not necessarily a reversal. This morning I woke up to the news that the national Komen Foundation had apologized to the American people and said they would reconsider their funding policy—but they didn't say they would reinstate the money, so I think American women are going to be watching to see what they really do.

This has been a rough year for Planned Parenthood politically, why do you think you've become such a political target, recently?
Well I believe that there are the same political motivations for going after Planned Parenthood through Komen or through Congress, it's the same right wing radical folks who are trying to hurt this organization because of the their political motivations.

But Planned Parenthood has been doing this work for decades. What's changed that you're in the spotlight so much this year?
Planned Parenthood has been around for almost 100 years. The very beginning of Planned Parenthood, Margaret Sanger, who started this organization, was thrown in jail for simply talking about birth control. She published a pamphlet and sent it through the mail, so she was prosecuted for that. When she came to speak in Portland, she was thrown in jail here, as well. While it looked like the debate after Roe in 1973 was about abortion, it always was about rights for women. It was about their right to know about birth control, it was about their right to have access to the information, to delay pregnancy or prevent pregnancies they don't want. What we've seen in the last year is a more blatant return to challenging women in this country, whether it's birth control or breast exams, in some way it's a return to the original social justice issued that Margaret Sanger stood for 100 years ago.

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Slabtown Changes Hands as the Bender Kicks Off

Posted by Ned Lannamann on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 11:28 AM

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The Slabtown Bender kicks off today, and it was announced this morning that Doug Rogers has purchased Slabtown from Brinda Coleman and Sam Soule. Rogers will be taking over operations after this weekend; the bar will be temporarily closed as he makes some minor changes, including:
upgrading the sound system, changing the menu, putting in some altars to musicians who’ve passed away (and that I venerate for their contributions to the music scene). Slabtown will reopen on February 24th with DJs, free foods, live music from the Bloodtypes and others, and our own version of Kaiju Big Battel.
Rogers also has plans for an unusual coterie of events at the NW bar, as he states:
I’m extremely easily bored, and Slabtown is going to have to entertain me as much as anyone else. Record swaps and sock hops, Blazer games, spaghetti feeds and the Church of RocknRoll, May Day and Labor Day events where the proceeds go to the staff instead of management, celebrations for Joey Ramone Day and Happy Moo Year, and as much live music as I have time to book. Yes, I’ll be keeping the pinball machines.
Here's wishing the very best of luck to Rogers as he takes the reins.

The Slabtown Bender kicks off tonight, with Wreckless Eric, the Trashies, Kid Congo Powers, and tons more. Get yer Slabtown Bender Weekend Wristbands here!

More Good Progressive News

Posted by David Schmader on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 11:14 AM

Earlier this week, the American Family Association group One Million Moms lashed out against JC Penney's new choice of spokesmodel:

Recently JC Penney announced that comedian Ellen Degeneres will be the company's new spokesperson. Funny that JC Penney thinks hiring an open homosexual spokesperson will help their business when most of their customers are traditional families. More sales will be lost than gained unless they replace their spokesperson quickly. Unless JC Penney decides to be neutral in the culture war then their brand transformation will be unsuccessful.

The good news: JC Penney doesn't give a shit, and has reiterated its support of Ellen as the company's new spokesperson. Read the full Yahoo! story on the aborted brouhaha here. (You'll notice that the Yahoo! story has over 10,000 comments, and the majority of them seem to be about how unappealing Penney's new TV ad is.

Artist Statements Are a Plague on the English Language.

Posted by Alison Hallett on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 10:59 AM

Which is why this made me laugh. From the band poster show at Meat Cheese Bread (home of the best breakfast burritos in Portland, I will fight anyone who says different):

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(Sorry, Angry Internet Person... Wait, no I'm not. I also took this picture yesterday.)

Best Mad Men Graffiti Tag Ever?

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 10:44 AM

As you may have heard, this stark poster for the new season of Mad Men has been getting a lot of play all around NYC...

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via

...which is of course providing a practically blank canvas for all sorts of hilarious graffiti and random vandalization. HOWEVER! What follows after the jump has been called the "best subway graffiti tag ever" and I tend to agree. HIT THE JUMP AND JUDGE FOR YOURSELF!

Continue reading »

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Greg Oden To Undergo Arthroscopic Procedure

Posted by Ezra Ace Caraeff on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 10:34 AM

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No, this isn't a vintage Blogtown post. It's new. The Trail Blazers announced this morning that the malfunctioning vessel known as Greg Oden will undergo an arthroscopic procedure on his right knee. For those keeping track at home, Oden's right knee was the original knee in which he had microfracture surgery on way, way, way back in 2007. Since then, his left knee has been the source of his recent ailments. The last time he played basketball in an NBA game was December 5, 2009, which was nearly 800 days ago.

I'm no doctor of kneeology, but his knee looks just fine in this recent (NSFW-ish) photo with a topless 6"7 woman. Christ, what a mess.

SL Letter of the Day: Lesbian Teen Not Happy With Her Parents—Or With Dan

Posted by Dan Savage on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 10:29 AM

Yeah, so I'm a 17-year-old lesbian and decided to be big and brave and come out to my parents. I did the whole "born this way," "please accept me," etc., that I'm sure everyone tries.

Things got pretty damn quiet, which was actually a good reaction in my books because my parents are kind of religious and the words "conversion therapy" were once-upon-a-time raised at the table as a good thing to have available to gay kids, so... I thought things went kind of well considering.

And then, guess what? My parents decided to have a nice sit down with me tonight and beside them is my Dad's laptop and on it is one of your videos on YouTube, which I though was pretty darn weird considering my parents usual tastes in entertainment. What played then was your video on women's sexuality with that lovely quote about your five lesbian friends—three of whom are now married to men. Bravo Dan, way to throw a sister under the bus. Because now my parents are taking your word as a fellow homosexual that there is no such thing as a woman being totally gay and that with a bit of therapy I can drag myself back to "straight."

Newsflash, Dan: I've never been into dudes. Like, ever. Always known it, from back when I prayed to God when playing spin the bottle it would land on my girl friends and not one of the guys. So some girls might like to swap and change, but others don't.

Not that I think you'll ever read this, but on the small off chance that you do, well, YOU SUCK. Like, so much. Think about what you say before you say it next time! I get that it obviously wasn't what you were trying to say. You saying that lesbians can change what gender they like is just made of fail.

Pissed Off Dyke

My response—and an epic email exchange with POD—after the jump.

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Mario's Gets in On the Super Bowl Sale Action

Posted by Marjorie Skinner on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 10:14 AM

Again, I'm increasingly irked at the still-persistent concept that women need an escape from their homes while the menfolk get their Superbowl on. Yeah, maybe I do have little to no interest in the game, and yeah I do appreciate just about any excuse for a sale, but this constant refrain is making me want to stay home double-fisting nachos and crushing beer cans on my forehead.

That said, eeeeeeeeeeeee! Mario's is getting in on the action with their tailgate party/Super Bowl sales, which thankfully are for both men and women, and furthermore, you can take advantage and still watch the game, too, because the "tailgate" portion starts today, winding up to Sunday, when they're offering half off of from final sale prices, AKA as cheap as Mario's gets.

Woot!! Win Tix to Tomorrow's "That's My Jam!" Dance Party!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 10:00 AM

Start stretching out now, because TOMORROW NIGHT is our Mercury Winter of Fun™'s "That's My Jam!" Dance Party and Contest! DJ Beyonda and Ill Camino will be spinning your favorite pop jam dance hits (think the greatest gay wedding reception ever), and we'll also be throwing a "Soul Train-style" dance line contest where YOU could win $100 and a can of Hormel Chili!

HOWEVER! Tickets are going extremely fast, and are only $5 advance, so get yours now or risk not getting in! OR if you feel extremely lucky, I'm giving away another five pairs of tickets away today! Simply email me here by 3 pm, put "That's My Jam" in the subject line, and include your name and your favorite dance jam song! (Beyonda may even play it for ya!)

The Merc staff will be out in full force for this one, so we'll see YOU at "That's My Jam!" tomorrow night at the Bossanova (722 E Burnside) from 9 pm till we die! DANCE!

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More Ties Between Ron Paul and White Supremacists Are Cropping Up All the Time

Posted by Paul Constant on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 9:44 AM

I admit it: Ron Paul has become such a docile figure in the 2012 Republican campaign that I kind of stopped paying attention to him for a while there. When he announced he was only going to focus on caucus states, that was pretty much the end of his national relevance. But luckily, shit just got incredibly interesting. Daily Kos linked to a NewsOne story about how....oh, man, this is just too good...Ron Paul was tied to a group of white supremacists who wanted to violently overthrow a small Caribbean nation so that they could create a libertarian white supremacist island paradise:


In 1981, a lawyer tried to subpoena Ron Paul to testify in the trial of Don Black, a Grand Wizard for the Ku Klux Klan who would later go on to found the white supremacist, neo-Nazi website, Stormfront. Black was charged along with two other Klansmen with planning to violently overthrow the small Caribbean country of Dominica in what they called “Operation Red Dog.”...In 1981 a group of American and Canadian white supremacists lead by Klansman and mercenary, Michael (Mike) Perdue planned on taking over a small West Indian country called Dominica by overthrowing the government and Prime Minister Eugenia Charles and restoring its previous prime minister, Patrick Johns into power. The group planned to create an Aryan paradise in Dominica and make money through casinos, cocaine and brothels.

Possibly even better than this story? Hacking group Anonymous has announced that they have uncovered close recent ties between Ron Paul's presidential campaign and a white supremacist group called American Third Position:

Fellow anons: we are pleased to bring you the dismantling of a major US-based white supremacist network known as the “American Third Position”(A3P). These racist losers have chapters across the US, operate several white power websites, forums and online stores, and are even running a candidate in the 2012 elections…In addition to finding the usual racist rants and interactions with other white power groups, we also found a disturbingly high amount of members who are also involved in campaigning for Ron Paul. According to these messages, Ron Paul has regularly met with many A3P members, even engaging in conference calls with their board of directors.

Go read Anonymous's announcement; it includes more information about A3P ties to neo-Nazi groups, Scientology, and much more. And don't forget to ask the ardent Ron Paul supporter in your life about these stories! We should build an online database of lame Ron Paul supporter excuses for Ron Paul's obvious white supremacist ties. It would be a world-class monument to delusion.

Good Morning News!

Posted by Sarah Mirk on Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 9:29 AM

Komen Foundation Backs Down! Here's what thousands of angry emails can do: The Susan G. Komen breast cancer foundation reversed its decision to cut funding to Planned Parenthood! Hooray! Less cancer for everyone!

Backfire: Oh, and BTW, the Komen Foundation's decision to pull funding brought Planned Parenthood a ton of new donations.

Iran vs. Israel: Iran believes Israeli soldiers are killing its nuclear scientists, Israel believes Iran is trying to stage revenge attacks.

Jobs! Jobs! Jobs! The US unemployment rate hits 8.3 percent, the lowest in three years!

Off the Hook: While the federal Security and Exchange Commission has stepped up investigations of Wall Street, they've avoided actually punishing large banks.

On the Other Hand... the Senate just passed an insider trading ban.

I Won't Stand in Their Way: Someone is planning a "cyber attack" on the Oscars.

Hilarious Ron Paul Supporters: Nevada's Ron Paul die hards look exactly like how you'd think they would, giant mustaches, guns, and all.

Roseanne is Running for President? Okay?

Scientists Lost Amid Russian Ice Land: Graham sent this news tip in, since it's a real-life beginning of The Thing.

Photos from the Beat: A RISD-schooled New York City cop has been taking amazing photos on his housing project beat.

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